The Poet Won’t Buy You A Drink by Joe Williams

The poet won’t buy you a drink
Don’t request it
Don’t suggest it
Because the poet won’t buy you a drink

It’s not that he wants to refuse
If he could do
He would love to
But the poet won’t buy you a drink

It’s not personal, please understand
Don’t feel rejected
Or neglected
If the poet doesn’t buy you a drink

The problem is purely financial
There’s no way
On his pay
That the poet could buy you a drink

So next time you go to a gig
Do your part
Support art
And buy the poor poet a drink

Joe Williams is a writer from Leeds and the creator of Haiku Hole.  In 2015 Joe began performing on the poetry and open mic circuit to inflict his work on a wider audience.  Some of them claimed to enjoy it, so you can blame them for encouraging him to continue.



Measure by Paul Vaughan

Dear Dating Profile; I’ve read about you.
Do you fancy a coffee? Or a trip to the zoo?
“So, you’re a poet? Well, how big are they?
What size do you come in? How tall did you say?”

Sighing, I wish I’d been born not at home,
but somewhere exotic, like Paris, or Rome,
and could explain that poets’ hearts beat,
and are measured in metres, and iambic feet.

Paul Vaughan lives in Yorkshire with his cat Rosie, and refuses to eat custard unless it is in a vanilla slice. He has poems forthcoming in Sarasvati, Seventh Quarry and online atThe Curly Mind. When not writing, he moonlights as the editor of


Love Poetry by Susan Jordan

Having found you were a poet, I knew then
I had to try to get us both to rhyme.
I dedicated hours of my time
to imagery of you, kept planning when

we’d meet again to workshop our shared verse,
crafting together each well-chosen line,
our assonance and alliteration fine-
ly tuned, our diction spare but never terse.

It didn’t happen. All my metaphors
foundered on your ellipsis, hit a rock
that broke their cadence. The poetic shock
severed our couplets, left me without yours.

If you hadn’t been a poet I’d have known
I was making verbal music on my own.

Susan Jordan has always written prose but until recently wrote poetry only from time to time. Inspired by 52, Jo Bell’s wonderful online group, she started writing a lot more poems. Her poems have appeared in print and online magazines including Prole, Obsessed with Pipework, Snakeskin and Ink, Sweat & Tears.